Do You Know The Muffin Man?

I have a heinous cold. That’s right. Not just a cold, but a heinous one. I was feeling much better earlier today and my dad brought me soup but the evil cold demons are creeping into my throat and dragging me down into the abyss of warm blankets, cold medicine brain, and bleary eyes.

So, I have nothing to blog about really.

Except, wait. My e-mail Inbox is always good for blog fodder.

Behold, the muffin top eliminating underwear for men!

Before:

After:

I got an actual press release about this product from designer Andrew Christian earlier this week and it is still cracking me up, although I’m sure there is a market for it.

The only thing that bugs me is they could have used a more dramatic “before” photo, like say my stomach on Thanksgiving afternoon. I mean COME ON people. Is that really a muffin top? Did he miss spin class that day? Is he, what, .8 ounces over his ideal weight? The anti-muffin top briefs are definitely not marketed toward the WalMart on payday crowd. They usually resort to big daddy coveralls and a white t-shirt. That variety of muffin top is beyond being reined in by some wimpy elastic band and is more accurately described as the one 12-pack too many beer belly. I’ll shut up for now before I start sounding like a bad Jeff Foxworthy routine.

The designer also has a line of butt lifting underwear for women. Now we’re talkin!

More absurdity in men’s foundational garments from I Could Cry But I Don’t Have Time.

Seinfeld was truly ahead of its time.

12 comments

  1. sandi says:

    I found you on Loralee’s blog, I am just surfing around, but didn’t want to just lurk. So, I am popping in for a quick hello.

    Sandi

  2. jessica bern says:

    There is a pair of ass lifting underwear, they are called Spanx. I believe that is one of their many “jobs”. They are at Vic. Secret and probably Nordstrom, I would imagine.

    They should send flyers for that stuff to the folks that live here in L.A.. The guys would be all over it.

    jessica berns last blog post..YOU ALWAYS HAVE OPTIONS

  3. Liza's Eyeview says:

    hey, it says that “butt lifting underwear for women” is a product not found on your link (yes, I actually clicked that link – LOL)

    Funny post to read at 2AM!

    Liza’s Eyeviews last blog post..Grateful

  4. Queen B says:

    This thanksgiving I am thankful that someone is eliminating male muffin top. That is practically Noble prize worthy.

    I hope that they come out with a cup that does away with male camel toe next. Talk about frightening!

  5. Steve Shaw says:

    I found your blog on google and read a few of your other posts. I just added you to my Google News Reader. Keep up the good work. Look forward to reading more from you in the future.

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