Yesterday I felt compelled to be super productive at work after missing most of the afternoon on Monday and I didn’t leave the office for lunch. That was mistake number one. I decided to nuke a frozen Lean Cuisine for lunch. That was mistake number two. By 3 o’clock the three morsels of grilled chicken that I cut into tiny pieces in an effort to savor each and every bite and the twelve Asian style noodles I had devoured had worn off and I was so hungry that I started digging through loose change in the bottom of my purse and debating whether or not I should hit the downstairs vending machine. I opted to drive down to the corner McDonald’s and get a dollar caramel sundae. By 5:30 I was so hungry and irritable with the kids and the dogs that I smashed my knee into our kitchen table while trying to nudge our 70-pound dog out of my way as I was trying to buckle a very squirmy Amelia into her high chair.
There is nothing worse than being hungry during rush hour and pickup from daycare. Because if your children are whining and hungry, it’s best to deal with them on a full stomach. I tend to get the shakes and have borderline low blood sugar when I am hungry any way. Translation, mama is one irritable beotch if she doesn’t eat enough. So if you ever see me in the break room at work heating up a Lean Cuisine, you’ll probably want to avoid me the rest of the day. And if you spot me on the highway, you’d better head the opposite direction because I’ll be one crazed with hunger woman scavenging the floorboard for abandoned Cheez-Its and Cheerios or maybe a tasty Altoid.