She’s My Cherri Pie

What is it with recent celebrity baby names? First there was Gwyneth Paltrow’s Apple, now there is Ginger Spice Geri Halliwell’s baby girl, Bluebell Madonna, and now there’s Cherri Pie, courtesy of none other than Anna Nicole Smith, the fabulously ditzy former Guess girl and Playboy playmate who’s back in her skinny jeans thanks to TrimSpa.

Rumors are swirling that Anna Nicole has a bun in the oven. Personally, I’m ready for someone to step in and take the pressure off of Britney Spears. One of Anna Nicole’s toy pooches is named Sugar Pie so if the fruit of her loins is named Cherri Pie, I give her an F for originality. (Which would probably match her cup size…) Anna Nicole as a new mom would be absolutely fabulous tabloid and/or reality show fodder. We need this comic relief, people, what with the recent birth of Scientology’s most famous baby, Suri TomKat, and the impending birth of the Who Knew Saving the World Could Look So Sexy Celebrity Baby (Brangelina’s creation).

Cue up Warrant’s “She’s My Cherry Pie,” because here are my candidates for worst fictional baby names based on desserts.

Twinkie
Tiramisu
Sorbet
Nutty Buddy
Brownie
Parfait
Eclair
Lady Fingers
Snicker Doodle

And my favorite…Bourbon Balls.

I could stomach Cherri Pie, no pun intended, if it was shortened to Cherri. But the “Pie” is the icing on the cake. All I can think of is a really bad Warrant video.

p.s. On another related Anna Nicole note, I find it humorous that her lawyer’s name is Howard Stern.

18 comments

  1. Charla says:

    Ok…I maintained composure until I got to Nutty Buddy. ROFLMAO! What a GREAT post!

    (and thanks for putting hair band music in my head for the rest of the day…Warrent leads to Poison, to GnR, to Def Leopard, and on and on and on)

  2. jag says:

    A co-worker was telling me about a friend of his who’s an OB, and the mother of a new baby (and about 6 old ones) told him that she hadn’t been able to come up with a name for this one and thanked him for naming the baby for her. When he asked what name she was talking about, she said “Fee-mal-ee”, like it read on her charts. The actual chart just read ‘female’.

    I then rebutted with a (poorly told) rendition of your hubby’s story about the woman in the ER and her toothbrush/toilet cleaner incident. That’s one worth getting in writing.

  3. jag says:

    Oh, and don’t forget Penn Gillete’s baby named Moxie Crimefighter and Jason Lee’s Pilot Inspektor.

  4. Nancy says:

    How about Blow Pop? Moon Pie? Fudge? Mallo Cup?

    Heh heh. This is such fun to think about. Too bad we’re done having kids. 😉

  5. Pattie (Domesticator) says:

    These celebrities should have to suffer with an equally bad name…Boubon Balls??? OMG….what were those parents on when they named that poor kid?

  6. Blonde Mom says:

    Pattie:

    I just added the word “fictional.” I completely made these up! Although…I bet some of these have been used. 😉

  7. Renee says:

    I’m going to have to go with some Cajun baby names here. How about Boudin or Etoufee or Jambalaya or maybe Gumbo (Gumbeaux to be trendy)?

  8. Jennifer says:

    Good lord.

    The spat of annoying, weird, new names is nauseating. The newest “thing” is Nevaeh (heven spelled backwards).

    Recently just in my comminuty two babies were born, one with the name Cinder, another Trinity.

    I guess we are rebels, going with the oldie but goodies. I really liked Violet (Ben Affleck/Jennifer Garners kid) but now everyone will want it too.

  9. Shauna says:

    I don’t know, I think Apple and Bluebell are both nice names. I do have a slight problem with Suri, but only because it’s awfully close to Pea’s name.

    Also, I’ve started to think that if there’s ever another girl in my future Marigold might be a nice name. Haven’t discussed that with my better half, though.

  10. mothergoosemouse says:

    Nutty Buddy, that is fantastic.

    All these foods masquerading as names are reminding me of Judy Blume’s book, Superfudge, where Fudge goes to kindergarten and his teacher refuses to call him Fudge. Given that Fudge’s real name is Farley Drexel, I have to admit that Fudge is not such a bad alternative.

    And Renee, I would not be at all surprised to find babies named Etoufee.

  11. Kristen says:

    Cherri Pie is going to have a lot more to worry about in life than her name, I’m afraid. Yikes.

  12. Library Mama says:

    Just think how popular Anna Nicole Smith would be at La Leche meetings. I’m sure she would be the consummate expert.

    How ’bout the names Pudding, JamJam, or Dainty?

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