Pontificating about poop and pinot noir since 2005
Where one girl is in a good mood…
and where neither is in a good mood simultaneously, especially on Saturdays when the husband is working and I am trying to run errands after morning soccer.
Pass the wine!
p.s. fun hat from Pink Cookie (I posted about a contest they are having over at my review blog, which ends Sept. 30)
After Friday’s Wendy Whiner post I realized that Miss C had a fun-filled week and waah waah waah so what if I ended up working most of it, because my girl had a fantastic fall break and that’s what really matters.
Here’s my working mother confessional, though. I did take last Thursday off, but it was for a fun event I’d been invited to some time ago that was blog related (more on that later) and hello guilt, why yes sit right down here beside me and make yourself at home. But the hubby took off that day and took the girls out for a picnic in the park and I was home by 3 so I shouldn’t have felt guilty. But I did. The hubby also had a crazy, stressful work week last week. Sigh.
One of my friends at work is a new mother and was talking to me a few weeks ago about feeling guilty and struggling with the decision to hire a nanny to watch her baby. She asked me if I ever feel guilty about parenting decisions I make since my girls are older. Uh, that would be a yes.
Tell me, if you are 40 or older, did you have some sort “Oh my Lord I’ve got to get my act together” panic attack when you turned 40? Because just when I feel I should be getting the hang of everything, I’m, well, not. As Scarlett O’Hara said, “Tomorrow is another day.” Of course Scarlett also wore curtains, drove her husband nuts, and was kind of a bitch.
My hormones also seem to be on overdrive. [Whisper voice to avoid scaring the hubby]...It’s like I have PMS any given day. Now that’s some scary stuff…and just in time for Halloween!
But you know what? We truly had a wonderful weekend and I love this time of year. Miss C spent the entire night for the first time ever at a slumber party Friday (yea) and her soccer team won Saturday afternoon in a closely matched game (double yea), and it was a gloriously beautiful fall weekend (triple yea). The girls carved pumpkins with my sister Saturday and I made a big ole pot of chili. Miss C has a school field trip this week and I’m going to help out that morning and head into the office late. I hope the weather is as gorgeous as it was this weekend. Miss A has a Halloween party Friday and both girls are crazy with excitement about trick or treating.
Their happiness is contagious. So take that moody mama hormones. Scarlett O’Hara also said, “As God is my witness, I’ll never feel guilty again.” (Really, I swear she did.)
(L-R from the top) Picnic at Warner Park with Daddy, my little cowgirl roasting marshmallows at Grandma’s, pumpkin carving divas with Jack the devil dog (I tried to fix his red eyes and just ended up making him look possessed), and Miss A’s pizza crust mustache.
Miss C has been enthralled with a Halloween commercial for Party City and wore me out with requests to truck out there all last weekend, although honestly that was the LAST thing I felt like doing on a beautiful fall afternoon.
We piled in my SUV and headed to the store. I cautioned her that it wasn’t really going to look like it did in the commercial but that it would be fun to look at the costumes and Halloween decorations. I didn’t want her to be disappointed. (See? Such a killjoy am I. See also speaking like Yoda.)
We walked in and she had this look on her face like “Oh, I get it now.” There was no creepy smoke or people walking around in scary costumes. It was just…a store. But still she was excited to look at the decorations and laugh at the macabre masks and begged me to buy a $19.99 plastic cauldron, which I did not. Insert evil mommy witch cackle.
When you’re a kid everything is literal. You see magic and smoke and ghosts and ghouls and mythical creatures on TV and your imagination grasps it and runs full speed ahead. Your whole life is filled with the endless possibilities fueled by imagination, wonder, and excitement.
And then you turn 40 and you have bills and deadlines and aging parents and a spouse who works too much and you’re running out of vacation days and wait, is the toilet leaking again, is the check engine light on, and is our dog, our “baby” from the early days of our marriage, really both deaf AND senile or is it normal for her to bark at a napkin left on the kitchen table?
Sigh.
I’ve become that “I hate to break it to you kid but this is kind of meh” kind of mother lately.
I think I’m in a delayed funk over turning 40.
There I said it. (Exhales.)
I’ve always been a glass half full kind of girl! A smiley face winky face emoticon kind of girl!
I’m fighting my tendency lately to look at the negative and the realistic tarnished side of things.
I’m fighting the funk because my girls have the world at their feet and they believe that every day is an adventure.
They believe that being a grown up is COOL, Miss C especially.
And hey sometimes being a grownup is cool. And I know that. (Smacks self on the forehead.)
I don’t ever want to rain on their parade, even when it takes us to the crappy Party City store down the road.
They deserve better than that.
I'm Jamie, just another working mom seeking a few moments of Zen and zinfandel between soccer practice and supper. My former beach bartender husband founded MouseCalls Computer Services here in Nashville. We have two daughters, two dogs, and too much laundry. I believe laughter is the best medicine, especially when administered with a good glass of wine, or three. Read more about me...
Popular Posts