A Tale of Two Titties

Let’s Hear It For The Girls

June 3, 2009 By Blonde Mom 9 Comments

I had a routine mammogram yesterday after rescheduling it and avoiding it for several months. Even though I’m just turning 40 this summer I’ve had to go in since 2007 when I found a pea-size lump in my right breast. I’ll spare you all the details because I’ve written about it quite a bit, but ultimately I had two walnut-size masses removed that were, thankfully, just fibrocystic tissue.

The technician who had the honor of booby smashin’ my girls was friendly and put me completely at ease. The first mammogram I had in 2007 was already a nerve-wracking experience and to add to my uneasiness, the technician had zero personality. I’m a talker by nature and I’m a nervous talker and really is there anything more awkward than another woman putting your boob in a giant vise and then photographing it?

The technician made the comment that I had cone-shaped boobs. “I bet that’s the best kind, right?” I joked with her.

“Well, I’ve seen everything under the sun. Really. You don’t want to know,” she quipped. “You know when Madonna wore that cone-shaped bra on stage? Yours are shaped like that. Larger on top and smaller on the bottom.”

I honestly think my boobs are NOTHING like that, although I am pretty happy they have held up fairly well after breastfeeding two babies. The celebrity comparison could have been unflattering.

Now if I can just get my arms to look like Madonna’s.

madonna-blonde-ambition-tour

p.s. The technician sent me on my merry way yesterday with my plastic bag containing my shirt and not cone-shaped in the least bra and said my doctor’s office would call me if they saw anything of concern. I’m fairly confident that since I have had my girls thoroughly analyzed over the past two years that I should have routine mammograms from now on. Yea!

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Save The Ta Tas Month

October 10, 2008 By Blonde Mom 5 Comments

I’m sure everyone knows by now that October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

I’ve written a lot about my experiences with mammograms and an MRI and a lumpectomy (oh my!) and I can’t stress how important it is to stay proactive about your health.

I thought I’d tell you about a few things going on that you may want to check out.

The always fabulous Texas mama Rachel is donating all ad revenue from her blog this month to Breast Cancer Research.

Over at Savvy Housewife I’ve got a giveaway for a pair of Karen Neuburger Pink Signature Collection chenille socks. KN is donating $75,000 to breast cancer research this year. Philosophy and award-winning artist and Nashville hometown girl Amy Grant have partnered to raise money and awareness for women’s cancer.

Design Her Gals is having their annual virtual walk to raise money for breast cancer research and several bloggers are participating, including the awesome Jersey girl Liz at This Full House.

Do you have any Breast Cancer Awareness month links to share?

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She Was Nervous, I Hope She Was Okay

July 23, 2008 By Blonde Mom 10 Comments

She was nervous.

She joined us in the waiting area. We were the mammogram brigade, sitting in our shapeless hospital gowns (open toward the front) and waiting to be called back or told we could go home, flipping through old issues of In Style and Better Homes and Gardens.

She told us she had found a lump, but she didn’t think it could be anything. Her nervous laughter, however, revealed her hidden angst.

Her daughters, especially her oldest, weren’t worried, she said. Her son, though, had been acting out and had been unusually quiet lately. Her face lit up when she spoke of her children.

“He’s worried about you, bless his heart,” the grandmotherly lady to my right commented.

We all nodded our heads and smiled. I told her I had found a lump almost two years ago and that everything had been just fine.

I told her in all likelihood she was just fine, too. Most lumps are nothing to worry about, I reassured her.

“It’s better to get checked out,” I said. “But it’s hard to wait.”

She was nervous.

“Breast cancer doesn’t run in my family…and I breastfed all three of my babies.”

A nurse walked around the corner and called my name, interrupting our ladies chatter: a group of women diverse in age and race. She told me I could go home and that I didn’t need to schedule another mammogram for another year.

I drove home and I thought about her off and on all weekend.

She was nervous.

I hope she was okay.