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I'm a 39-year-old working mom to two girls trying to stay sane and away from the Barbie PopTarts. I'm also a writer and editor with more than 17 years of experience. BlondeMomBlog is a top Google search result for "mom blog" and I'm kind of proud of that ya'll.

Considering Banning Spongebob Indefinitely

On the way home from buying a new mattress Sunday (rest in peace old plank, hubby and I and our twinging backs will not miss you), the girls were giddy with late afternoon errand running tiredness and the amusement of pouncing on mattress after mattress after mattress. When the very young salesperson told us to lie down on our prospective mattress and just relax for 15 minutes or so to get a feel for it we laughed because by then the girls would have hijacked the store delivery truck and headed for the nearest McDonald’s.

I turned around to tell the girls something and Miss C makes a comment that can only come from a 6-year-old.

Mommy, let me see your Spongebob teeth.

What?

Mommy, you’ve got Spongebob teeth

I am then bombarded with a litany of Spongebob insults from Miss C which somehow segued into boob talk (it’s either boobs or poop around here) followed by non-stop laughter and Miss C giving herself a wicked case of the hiccups from laughing so hard.

Mommy you’ve got Spongebob boobies!

No…you’ve got Patrick boobies!

And then the worse of the backseat club insults:

Mommy you’ve got Squidward boobies!


I’m not sure what classifies my boobies as Squidward boobies, but it can’t be good.

22 responses to “Considering Banning Spongebob Indefinitely”

  1. Renee

    Uh-oh. Squidward doesn’t even have boobies!

    Renees last blog post..John’s Wish

  2. Mrs. Schmitty

    At least they didn’t say the grandma fish from Spongebob, hers practically drag the floor!

    Mrs. Schmittys last blog post..BlogHer Talk

  3. Ernestine

    So far none of this has been shared on their days with grandma.
    They are perfect!

  4. HRH

    I have those two. I mean too. UGH.

    HRHs last blog post..Where is Holly?

  5. Jill

    I’ll send my son over so he can add p*nis talk to the mix and you should all the bases from head to toe covered.

    Jills last blog post..AKA: Jill Partridge Garrett

  6. amy @ milk breath

    LMAO over here James! Sorry.

    My husband does a wicked-good Patrick imitation. (Yeah, I’m proud.)

  7. DawnK

    We haven’t gotten to SpongeBob yet, we are still fixated on Bunnytown.

    Although recently Harper (who is 2) just discovored that Mommy’s boobies and Daddy’s boobies and his are very different. Especially since I am 8 3/4 pregnant. As Billy put it, his facisnation will never go away. Nice…thanks Daddy!

    DawnKs last blog post..Oh My Aching Everything

  8. Jackie

    I liken my boobs to a different cartoon character from my childhood….

    DROOPY

    ;)
    Jackie

    Jackies last blog post..Just call me Grampy…if you must!

  9. Ma Val

    I decided to stop sharing the bathroom with my daughter when she told me mine were “hangy” and “silly”.

  10. Bluegrass Mama

    Fortunately, I can only relate to the new mattress/ non-twinging backs portion of this post, as my daughter rarely watches Sponge Bob and rarely shares his brand of humor with me.

    Bluegrass Mamas last blog post..Sports Ramblings

  11. Pattie

    Hmmm…since Squidward’s boobs are non-existent, I guess that doesn’t bode well for you LOL

  12. Mary

    ha! well, at least squidwad doesn’t have to worry about tripping over “hers”.

    Marys last blog post..Part 3: Don’t go there

  13. Amanda

    Uh Oh Cut her off. Just kidding.
    I am sure it’s a compliment.

    Amandas last blog post..Today Is Another Day!

  14. Toast 2 Mom

    Uh-oh… our household is just getting into SpongeBob. Now I’m scared. It’s the ONLY thing on that I can occupy Syd with so I can get the baby to sleep!

    Toast 2 Moms last blog post..I’m Tired of Hearing I’m Tired

  15. Mof2

    Too funny….How did they get boobies from Spongebob??

  16. Mari Ickes

    Squidward boobies really does have to be the worst insult I’ve heard, even from a 5 year old, and 5 year olds can come up with some doosies!

    Mari Ickess last blog post..Another Nose Story

  17. Kalisha

    Sorry to hear the insults came down to squidward boobies! Too funny! My 2 1/2 year old loves spongebob and sometimes when I watch it with her I can’t believe some of the jokes in there. Luckily, now she doesn’t comprehend them.
    I know if I let her continue to let her watch it then I’m going to be due for my set of spongebob insults too! Right now she like to call me “poopie!”
    Or her latest was “Double whooo whoo!” I really don’t know what that means, but she cracks up everytime!

  18. Spongebob Squarepants DVD Giveaway | Savvy Housewife

    [...] Parents fall into one of two Spongebob camps: the lovers and the haters. Personally my husband and I love Sponge Bob, although I came very close to banning Spongebob during the Sponge “boob” incident. [...]

  19. Year In Review, Now With More Poo | Blonde Mom Blog

    [...] our 39th birthdays. I had a mammogram and worried about one of the women in the waiting area. I considered banning Sponge Bob after the girls told me I had Squidward [...]

  20. Year In Review, Now With More Poo | Blonde Mom Blog

    [...] our 39th birthdays. I had a mammogram and worried about one of the women in the waiting area. I considered banning Sponge Bob after the girls told me I had Squidward [...]

  21. Year In Review, Now With More Poo | Blonde Mom Blog

    [...] our 39th birthdays. I had a mammogram and worried about one of the women in the waiting area. I considered banning Sponge Bob after the girls told me I had Squidward [...]

  22. Year In Review, Now With More Poo | Blonde Mom Blog

    [...] our 39th birthdays. I had a mammogram and worried about one of the women in the waiting area. I considered banning Sponge Bob after the girls told me I had Squidward [...]

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