We rolled in from the beach this evening and were hit with a nasty smell as soon as we walked in the door. At first I thought we had left some garbage in the kitchen garbage can. Then I saw a trail of melted chocolate ice cream mixed in with an unidentified gooey slick of freezer sludge on the floor in front of the refrigerator and I knew.

The darn thing died.

We’ve only had our refrigerator (Kenmore Elite, my ass) for seven years and it’s been nothing but a problem child appliance.

We had some other unfortunate appliance/electronic/automobile related mishaps happen while on vacation. Our portable DVD player was stolen from my car the night before we left (we had left my car unlocked as we were in that pre-vacation happy daze and our dogs were already at my brother’s house…usually they go crazy if anyone steps foot on to our property.) You can bet your bottom parent consumer dollar that our first stop Thursday morning en route to the beach was to buy a new DVD player for the seven to eight hour car ride to the Florida panhandle. And after spending Sunday morning at the zoo in Gulf Breeze, something hit my windshield while we were driving down the highway and it is now sporting a lovely crack right down the middle.

Any way, back to more pressing (foul smelling) matters. Thankfully I hadn’t done any major grocery shopping since Miss C’s birthday on the 12th since I knew we’d be leaving soon for vacation. The only consoling thought is knowing that the refrigerator was apparently destined to die and that perhaps it thought it would be an easier loss to deal with after we’d spent several days relaxing at the beach. I could have lived, however, without pulling the rancid baby back ribs and ground chuck from the freezer.

RIP refrigerator. We’re replacing you tomorrow…with a Maytag, more than likely from Home Depot.

Oh and speaking of stinky, it appears that we are fresh out of diapers. I guess Miss A will be sporting a Little Mermaid swim diaper to daycare in the morning.

Edited to add: The refrigerator, she is WORKING! The hubby flipped the breaker switch and unplugged it and plugged it back in. We had a record-breaking heat day on Sunday here so maybe it has something to do with that. I’m just happy we have a cold refrigerator.

Another update, unfortunately: The ice in the freezer is melting. It appears to be dead, yet again. We’re headed to Lowes as their delivery time is much faster.

Little Mermaids, originally uploaded by blondemom.

Psssttt…we’re on vacation at my dad’s condo in Florida, aka Papa’s Beach. Click on the girls’ photo for a few more pictures.

My fairy blogmother shipped a whole slew of Johnson & Johnson products for me to review. I don’t have the best skin, so I was thrilled to try some new products!

I didn’t realize that Johnson & Johnson makes both Aveeno and Purpose skincare products. And did you know that Aveeno has a great new sunscreen line? The baby sunblock SPF 45 works great on Miss A, who has very fair skin. I sent it to daycare for her playground time. She usually looks like Pigpen from the old Peanuts cartoons when I pick her up in the afternoons, but at least I don’t have to worry about her getting sunburned. I have also tried the SPF 45 continuous spray sunblock on myself and the girls. It’s lightweight and easy to toss in my pool bag or our jog stroller, because Lord knows I have been lugging enough snacks, baby wipes, and other paraphernalia around this summer to outfit a small day camp. (Read on …)

No, no, it’s not what you think.

I thought I’d share another peaceful vignette from our pastoral life. This is a prime example of the mini heart attacks the girls can induce, although nothing beats the time Miss C the 2-year-old gleefully ran away from me toward a busy strip mall parking lot when I was about 9 months pregnant with Miss A and everything went all slow motion on me, but not in a good superhuman Bionic Woman sort of way.

Any way, just yesterday morning I was snuggling (awwww) with Miss C.

Miss C, we need to clean your ears with a Q-tip. (I’m not sure what possessed me to think of that at that very moment, but I’m a pretty random thoughts kind of gal.)

Mommy…my friend L at school? She tried to stick a mulch chip in my ear and [she paused, as if for emphasis]…GET STUFF OUT!

Miss C, PLEASE don’t ever let anyone stick anything in your ear! That could really hurt you! Please don’t do that.

Why? Would it would hurt my bones?

No, but it could really hurt your ear. Don’t ever EVER stick anything in your ear. Didn’t it hurt when she tried to stick a mulch chip in your ear?

Just a little bit. But that’s OK mommy. Sometimes doctors hurt you on accident!

Sigh…

Speaking of mini heart attacks, we’re about to spend five days doing nothing but hitting the beach, pool, and water park with She Who is Trying so Hard to Learn to Swim and Loves Her New Strawberry Shortcake Water Wings and her baby sister, She Who Cannot Swim and Sinks Like a Rock, But Who is Fearless in the Water and Rebels Against Wearing Water Wings Despite the Fact that They Have Elmo on Them, Dammit.

I’ve been on the OSD (Oh Sh*t Diet) with our annual summer trip to the beach getting closer. The excuse for my mid-section flabalanche, “I’ve had two babies,” is getting a little old now that Miss A is not only starting to use the potty some, but is telling me specifically what type of potty she wants (Dora, thank you very much.)

About a month ago I decided to be proactive about losing the five pounds I’ve been saying I need to lose for the past two years. Since I’m lazy and really hate going to the gym, I started walking more with the hubby and the girls and I also cut out all my “treats.” Drastic times call for drastic measures.

I quit fixing my near nightly bowl of ice cream even though the BEST stuff I’ve tried in a while is Blue Bunny Banana Split sugar free. And I don’t do sugar free, people. My mother-in-law tried it and didn’t care for it, but I could have eaten the entire carton in one sitting. I’ve also cut out Cokes and beer and wine and fast food and pretty much anything “bad.” No wonder I’ve been one cranky mama. Who knew that sugar, fat, and alcohol made me so happy?

The hubby has also really been watching what he eats and getting up early every day and walking. He’s having a lot more success with the OSD than me.

Why is it that men can eliminate a few things from their diet and lose five pounds in no time?

I think I’ve lost one pound and that’ s on a good day and only if I weigh a la naturelle.

The girls and I hit suburban shopping heaven on Earth (aka Target) yesterday with cold hard birthday cash. Sixteen dollars and thirty-three cents later we were the proud owners of a blueberry scented doll and yet one more confounded My Little Pony. Oh well. Anything to avoid the Bratz sensation.

We headed to my mom’s for a Sunday afternoon visit. When we left it was well after 3:30 and Miss A was deliriously loopy from lack of napping. She fell asleep, not surprisingly, after I’d been driving for just a few minutes. Then things got really quiet and I could see in the rearview mirror that Miss C was snoozing right along side her. Eureka! Score one for mama. I actually considered just driving around for a while and enjoying the glorious silence.

We pulled in the driveway and my neighbor’s 6-year-old was perched on her playset ready to greet the girls with her sing-song voice but I motioned for her to be quiet. She probably picked up on my crazy neighbor mom desperate to keep her kids asleep during a rare dual afternoon nap vibe. I carried Miss A to the couch where she continued napping, but Miss C woke up the second I opened the back gate and she made a bee line to our swing set. I went inside to check on Amelia and then could hear Miss C yelling over and over, quite obnoxiously, “Mommy swing me, mommy swing me, mommy SWINGGGGGG MEEEEEEEEE!”

It dawned on me that my other next door neighbors were having an open house and that our swing set is in the corner of our backyard closest to theirs and I had seen people milling about their yard. I opened the window and shushed Miss C.

Hopefully she didn’t discourage any potential home buyers. Of course, they haven’t heard anything until they’ve been subject to Bailey’s ability to bark nonstop at a stick for thirty minutes.

Any way, if you need a 5-year-old girl with a voice that just won’t quit or a dog with a bark so annoying it will drive you to drink, let me know.

p.s. Dawn, either Miss C or Bailey are available to come over the next time your neighbor fires up the drum set in his back yard and you want to retaliate.

Twinkle Toes, originally uploaded by blondemom.

My sister in Massachusetts sent these to Miss C. You apply your own bling and it’s a very fun and easy craft project. I think Miss C did a fabulous job of decorating her dancing shoes, although mama helped her out a bit.

I wish these came in my size.