It looks like Ernesto is not going to rain on our parade beach vacation. We’re heading to Navarre Beach, in the Florida Panhandle, next week to stay at my dad’s vacation condo. It’s the first time we’ve been down since July 2004. At that time Amelia was a mere twinkle in our eyes and I just KNEW I was pregnant but was still getting a big fat negative on all the home pregnancy tests I was taking. The condo, particularly the pool area, just got the finishing touches from repairs necessitated by the devastation left in the wake of last year’s Hurricane Dennis. Thankfully Ernesto lost steam when he blew through Key West yesterday.

The last time the hubby and I were in Key West was our honeymoon in May 1997. We stayed at this incredibly romantic inn and enjoyed a wonderful poolside breakfast every morning before heading out for the day. We hit all the popular spots…Sloppy Joe’s bar, the Conch Tour Train, the Ernest Hemingway house with its famous six-toed kitty residents, sunset on Mallory Square, and a day trip to Bahia Honda State Park in Big Pine Key, as well as lesser-known hot spots like the incredible Blue Heaven, where we ate an incredible meal while chickens pecked around the courtyard. My sister and her husband even treated us to a surprise gift certificate to Kelly’s Caribbean Bar and Grill, owned by actress Kelly McGillis.

One of our funniest honeymoon memories happened one night when we were walking down Duval Street. We walked by one bar where a few boisterous drag queens were trying to lure tourists inside with their hilarious cat calls. They immediately zoned in on the hubby and his all American good looks. “Oh honey, come on in we’ll treat you right!” We laughed and told them we were on our honeymoon but we had a good time joking with them. Besides I didn’t want to make these drag queens mad, seeing as they all towered over me and could whip my wimpy straight girl self. I think this was also the night, unfortunately, that I had one too many cocktails. The hubby had a “What planet are you from and what did you do with my wife?” moment when I did my best Nightmare New Bride impersonation at one bar. (Some women get amorous when they drink too much, but unfortunately my husband got the short end of the horny stick with me because I can also either get extremely bitchy or fall asleep.) I gladly stuck with plain wine or beer the remainder of our honeymoon. Who knows…maybe someone put something crazy in my drink that night? Yeah, that’s it.

One of the coolest things we did on our honeymoon was rent a convertible after our flight from Nashville landed in Ft. Lauderdale. We drove down through the Keys, top down, surrounded by beautiful blue water and blue sky. Not that we drove much once we arrived. Key West is very pedestrian friendly (try finding a decent parking space.) Besides, you’ll miss the drag queens if you’re not on foot.

So, tell me. Have you ever seen Hank Williams Jr. sans sunglasses? Also, despite the fact that I’ve never owned a Hank Jr. CD in my life, the words to All My Rowdy Friends, Country Boy Can Survive and Family Tradition are permanently etched in my brain. The opening strains are like a subliminal call of the redneck urging me to drink Bud from a can and shout yee haw at the top of my lungs. I think it’s some sort of high school field party post traumatic syndrome. Sweet Home Alabama is another Southern anthem that gets me going.

Any way, I was surprised to see Bocephus not wearing his shades as he got rowdy following the post-Nashville nuptials of his buddy Kid Rock to Pamela Anderson. What’s next? Kid Rock not wearing a broken-in wife beater? Who knows. Kid Rock may pull a Kfed and sign a modeling contract…maybe for Hanes?

Tonight was my turn to take Caitlin to soccer practice. She had a great time and even scored a goal during their scrimmage. The coach told her “way to go Caitlin, you were on fire!” after her goal. When practice was over we celebrated by ordering frozen yogurt sprinkled with Reese’s Pieces and M&Ms at TCBY and she kept saying proudly, “I made fire mama! I made fire!” Yeah, baby. You sure did.

At one point during practice I was making small talk with two moms and as the coach broke out some insect repellant the subject of bug bites came up which segued into tick bites and the fact that our state’s governor has finally recovered from a mysterious tick borne illness. (Lucky dog, he lost 15 pounds!)

I, of course, had to tell them that I’d been sick last month with the freakishly odd summer pneumonia, but that my doctor initially misdiagnosed me as having a tick borne illness such as Lyme Disease or Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever. I realized about 15 seconds into my pneumonia speech that their eyes were glazing over and I’d forever typecast myself as the mom who gabs too much about personal weird trivial health facts that they could give a rat’s ass about. Great. Now my only hope is to lay low and stick to safe conversation starters like the weather. I think I need to brush up on my How to Win Friends and Influence People skills.

Both my girls attend a state licensed day care in our neighborhood four, sometimes five, days a week. Julie at MotherGooseMouse has a great post about the Do’s and Don’ts of working productively with your childcare provider. She’s been a sub at her daughters’ daycare and has great insight into what it’s like to not only being a daycare parent, but a daycare teacher.

Caitlin is in the preschool class and I can’t say enough good things about it. I am amazed at the thought, planning and creativity her two teachers put into the curriculum. Each week they have a theme (this week’s theme is emotions). Their storytime book as well as artwork coincides with the theme. These teachers get more creative bang for their buck out of construction paper, crayons, footprints, and handprints then I would ever be able to muster. One child is chosen each week to be the special classroom helper and they study a featured letter and number weekly. They also have special assignments from time to time. For the next month or so a child is chosen to take home the “favorites tote” and fill it with a favorite snack to share with their classmates, a favorite book, and two favorite family photos. Today was Caitlin’s day to bring in the tote and she was so excited. They have show and tell on Thursdays and in the summer Caitlin also had outdoor water play.

Caitlin and Amelia’s teachers give them hugs and reassurance and praise. Both my girls have learned to play with children their own age, follow directions, and learn to wait their turn. Caitlin has had teachers and classmates from different cultures and ethnicities. One of her all-time favorite teachers (she still makes a point to say goodbye to her every evening) is from Iran. I have no doubt that she will be prepared for kindergarten next year.

Amelia just moved to the Toddler I room at “school.” Even at 17 months she has structured indoor play, story time, outdoor play, and art time. Although the benefits of daycare are not as yet evident with her, I know in the long run she will be as prepared for real school as her sister in a few years.

Daycare is not for everyone. But in our situation (I work 4 days a week and the hubby runs his own business), it’s been the best solution for our family.

So do you have any praise for the childcare provider in your child’s life, be it a daycare center, a Mother’s Day Out church program, babysitter, nanny, or just good ole grandma?

Simply Fabulous Dahling

Originally uploaded by blondemom.

If you apply ice immediately to a goose egg bump on the noggin’, it will magically make the day after bruise barely detectable. Amelia’s booster seat tipped out of the chair it was strapped to and she went with it. And yes, it was loose, and yes, I should have tightened it. Lesson learned. Edited to add: Ok, maybe not a goose egg…maybe more like a Robin’s egg?

My husband is a very tolerant man. He endured the girls putting on a divas in the den dress up show Saturday night while he was trying to watch the Titans get their asses whooped yet again.

Does anyone really like Shakira’s “Hips Don’t Lie” song? Gah.

I’m glad I had the brilliant idea to Tivo the Emmys so I can rewind Kiefer Sutherland’s appearance over and over and over again.

I’m also thrilled that the aliens who abucted my sweet 4-year-old and replaced her with a tyrannical brat returned her late yesterday. She was a sweetheart at the grocery store with the hubby (of course) and even went to bed on her own without any protests.

Cheap colorful bendy straws have worked as a great motivator for Caitlin to drink her milk.

You can actually wash dishes by hand if forced to. Our dishwasher controls are stuck and they can’t get up.

My dad came over yesterday and plopped down on the floor to play with the girls. I cringed because I hadn’t vacuumed in several days and our big dog, Jack, is in the midst of his slow summer shed, in which he commences to lose enough hair to stuff a loveseat or maybe one of those giant cheap stuffed animals you see at the county fair, but wonder if anyone actually wins.

Here is a glossary of terms which pretty much sum up the state of housekeeping in our home (and I am the Merry Maid at our house so I can’t fire myself, although it’s tempting):

Hairanoia
Fear that a relative or neighbor will drop by unexpectedly and plop right down on the carpet, which has not been vacuumed for days, and be instantly covered in dog hair.

Carpet Fresh
The pristine carpet underneath the couch that you discover when you pull said couch from the wall to vacuum that makes you remember what clean carpet is supposed to look like.

Laundry Dunes
Similar to sand dunes, only they consist of large piles of wrinkled, but clean, laundry that has yet to be put away and probably won’t be any time soon.

Refrigerator Sludge
The mysterious spillage at the bottom of the fridge. Could be from fruit, could be from a pound of ground beef. Just don’t touch it with your bare hands.

The hubby offered to get me a gift certificate for a housekeeping service recently but I’m one of those weirdos who will end up cleaning the house for an hour before the housekeeper arrives and then really, what is the point?

So do any of you actually prescribe to this theory? I’m a skeptic, although I’m sure it’s fabulous for some people. And I hate to admit this but I’ve discovered that playing that Barney “Clean Up” song is a great motivator for Caitlin to actually pick up her toys. She also loves to wipe down any and every surface (including wood, so I have to watch her) with those disinfecting wipes. Now if I can just get her to clean the toilets…

This week I’m thankful for:

Caitlin’s continued newfound love for soccer.

Amelia finally sleeping well after a horrible summer cold (12 hours solid Tuesday night…HALLELU-YAH). Sleep deprivation was kicking my butt and taking names.

Our upcoming beach vacation.

Last night’s beautiful sunset. (Red sky at night, sailor’s delight.)

Lunch with my best friend today at this place (although I’ll miss Houston’s, which this new restaurant replaced, and their awesome cheese toast…I remember eating there in 1986 before my junior prom.)

My cute silver charm bracelet from my best friend which has an engraved charm for each of my girlies as well as a flip flop charm.

Edited to add (just to get a rise out of my hubby): Beating the hubby and getting the all-time high score on the Tivo game, SameGame, the very first time I sat down to play it last night. Mwaa haa haa haa. That game is highly addictive.