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I'm a 39-year-old working mom to two girls trying to stay sane and away from the Barbie PopTarts. I'm also a writer and editor with more than 17 years of experience. BlondeMomBlog is a top Google search result for "mom blog" and I'm kind of proud of that ya'll.

Up, Up and Away in My Beautiful Brassiere

Any woman who has birthed a babe and had their breasts balloon to frightening proportions knows that the ole mammaries just ain’t what they used to be after such stretching and eventual deflation. The 2006 model of moi is a bit more relaxed, shall we say, and I don’t mean mentally. For weeks I’ve been eyeing these colorful bras in my dresser drawer that I bought in the last months of my pregnancy with Miss A. They were on sale at Target and well, you know, I can’t resist a sale and I needed a little color in my life and Lord knows a pregnant woman needs colorful underwire bras that could double as pool flotation devices. Seriously, I could use them as chip and dip holders. I just can’t seem to toss them but there is no way in heck I will ever be able to fill those puppies out again. After two pregnancies and breastfeeding two babies, my breasts may disappear into my ribcage when I lie on my back, but by God they were workhorses back in the day!

This week I made my weekly trek to TJ Maxx (because I am a closet TJ Maxx addict). They had all these lacy pretty things on clearance and I picked out about 60 bras to try on thinking at least one would fit. I found one I really liked that was comfy to boot. I wore it last week and it was like my girls had gone from riding in a VW Bug to a jacked-up monster truck…they were so perky! If my boobs were a passage in a book it would have BEEN IN ALL CAPS! Of course part of the illusion of perkiness was the fact that I was wearing one of those fitted lycra blend shirts (you know the kind…a size women’s small would fit my 3-year-old). Any way, all day I was self-conscious about my chest and its newfound perkiness. I felt like everyone was looking at me and wondering where the heck those came from. Yeah, right.

16 responses to “Up, Up and Away in My Beautiful Brassiere”

  1. buffi

    Oh, yeah. I can relate. I can buy my bras in the little girls dept. now. Which I guess is good as I suppose that there is nothing there to sag in a few years. But, still.

    Those t-shirts are good for the self-esteem, though, aren’t they? Except when my husband folds laundry. He always puts them in with SugarPlum’s clothes. sigh

  2. Nancy

    There is something amazing about a pretty and well-fitting bra. It’s kind of like a whole wardrobe change!

  3. Charla

    I have no comment on the little boob thing…My puppies have always seemed to sag. Sigh

  4. Mari

    I so needed to read this post today. And disappearing into the ribcage? I have no idea what you are talking about…ahem…

    BTW, the laugh was what I needed. Not reading about your brassieres, per se.

  5. Anne

    You are so right. I now LIVE in these totally artificial padded bras and exclaim to my husband, ‘look at what your children, and you yourself by extension (as it were), have wrought upon my poor, unlucky, unloved, and much deflated bosom.

  6. Helene

    lol- I can totaly relate. soft padded underwires have become my beast friend. the best thing about them is I don’t have to worry about the high beams showing through :)

  7. Bethiboo

    I can relate! Before my breast reduction surgery my boobs were near my waist even with the bottom of my ribcage. You could pick them up and place them in an upright palm like a frisbee or large pancake! My n——-s were even with my elbows. I am glad I got mine hiked up!!

  8. » I Blog, Therefore I Must Think…I Think

    [...] This blog is a fun outlet for me. At work I nitpick, edit, write, and proofread documents intended for very starched shirt, button up type publications, so this girl just wants to have fun on her blog. I do not strive to address heady political or cultural debates. Nay, verily, I pretty much stick to safe topics such as poop, boobs, and funny things my girls do and say. So imagine my surprise earlier this week when I was nominated twice in one day for a Thinking Blogger Award! One from the lovely Liz at This Full House who is the busiest blogger I know (perhaps even busier than Busy Mom!) and who also has a heck of a lot of laundry and another one from the lovely Mrs. Schmitty, who just celebrated her birthday. [...]

  9. Layla

    It’s tough being a bigger girl… I have such a hard time finding nice styles in my size. Oh yeah… by the way great post!

  10. Going Crunchy

    I’ll trade! I’ll trade!

    Man, seems like I spent half my life wanting bigger boobs, now I just want them to go away. After kids the twin sisters went South to Mexico and haven’t made it back up to the States yet.

    I want a suck, tuck and lift when I’m done – - and I’m not a vain person at all- – -I just want to see my toes again.

    Going Crunchy’s last blog post..High Hopes for the Pea Plant

  11. Jasmine

    You should check out Change of Scandinavia, they have stylish bras in a huge range of sizes. They have bras of all kinds, basic AND stylish!

  12. The Happiness Workshop Brisbane

    Thanks for the post, something to ponder on

  13. Miracle Breasts

    I believe BBC did a study a while back and found that many women who hoped to undergo a breast reduction procedure really just needed a proper fitting bra. The one’s they had been wearing were giving them the false illusion that their breasts were really in need of a cosmetic makeover.

    Miracle Breastss last blog post..Breast Augmentation Connecticut

  14. Bust Enhancement

    I dont think you should have breast reduction i love bigger boobs but if they are causing you problems i suppose you have no other option.

  15. Margret Shellhammer

    A bra is like a good boyfriend, supportive.

    Margret Shellhammers last blog post..Reborn Babies for Sale

  16. Margret Shellhammer

    A bra is like a good boyfriend, supportive.

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